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Have you recently been thinking about an ex-partner in romantic terms again? Whether you are considering trying to give it a second chance with someone from your past, or you are just interested in hooking up with a former partner for a bit of fun, reconnecting with an ex can be a bit of a minefield. Whether or not to do it in the first place and how you approach it are not things to take lightly.
In this article, we’re going to look at how to know whether it is a good idea to try to reconnect with an old flame, and how to go about it if you decide to.
What Are Your Motivations for Considering Getting in Touch with Your Ex?
The first thing to consider is what you actually want from any potential reunion. If you feel like an ex was ‘the one that got away’ and you want to pursue a serious relationship with them, this is quite a different situation from thinking about going back to a partner that things didn’t go well with, and different again from just wanting to see someone you used to date again for a bit of fun. Figure out what it is you want to achieve, and also, look at why you are thinking about this in the first place.
Don’t rush into anything. If you think there is a chance you may just be lonely and be thinking of your ex as a ‘better the devil you know’ situation because you haven’t managed to find somebody else you are happier with, then it could be better to try meeting somebody new through things like online dating. If you are just horny and frustrated and are thinking an ex is an easier option for a casual hook up than meeting someone new, then while it depends on the type of person your ex is and what kind of relationship you had before, this kind of thing can often end up being more emotionally taxing and complicated than you may have hoped.
Spend some time thinking it through, and if you feel like you might just be having this sudden interest in your ex again due to being bored, lonely or sexually frustrated, then try some other stuff that will definitely have no strings attached for relief before you make any moves. For instance, spending some time with a camgirl might help. Babestation is a good site to check out for friendly, open-minded cam girls to suit all tastes, so maybe relaxing with a cam girl on a platform like that might show you whether or not you’re genuinely interested in your ex, or just looking for some sexy fun and attractive company.
What is the Current Situation?
If you now know that you really do want to reconnect with your ex romantically or sexually, and that this is something that appeals to you more than finding somebody new, then you need to consider both how things ended and what your current situation is with them. If you and your ex are still in touch, then it can be best just to be honest with them about how you feel – perhaps inviting them out or to come over to create the right mood. If things didn’t end badly but you haven’t been in touch for a long time, then approaching them through social media can be the easiest way to open up a conversation with them again, however, be prepared that if you haven’t spoken to them for a long time, their situation and life may well have changed.
They may not be single or looking for anything at the moment, and also they may be different now. If you are thinking about the fun, party animal you dated in university five years ago, she may now be a serious career woman who has put her more carefree days behind her. They may also have completely different goals in life now. The woman you dated a few years ago who was always up for some casual fun may now be looking to settle down, and not interested in the kind of relationship you used to have anymore.
If the situation is more complex, for instance, if it was a serious long-term relationship and you want to get back together, then really, every situation is unique, and only you know how possible getting what you want will be.
In any case, you need to decide how you are going to start talking to your ex again, find out whether they are even open to the kind of thing you want, and then prepare to make your move.
Focus on the Positives
There must have been some really good things about your ex and the time you spent together if you have gotten this far through the process and are ready to try to rekindle things with them, and so these are what you need to focus on as you begin to talk and spend time with them again. Reminding them of the good things that were the reason you want to be with them again can be a good place to start, and so can making them aware of how much you value them – even if maybe you didn’t realise it the first time around.
You may also have some things to address from the past, for instance, things that created friction or even caused the breakup, that you can show them have changed on your end. If there was anything in particular that was a problem before, then it can feel like the elephant in the room until you bring it up and clear the air if you are starting things up anew.
Sometimes, second-chance relationships can work out extremely well, as sometimes, people who were very compatible just weren’t in the right place at the right time the first time they got together. People often manage to make things work better when they are older and more experienced than they could earlier on in life. It can be a decision you won’t regret to try to reconcile with an ex-partner, but just be sure you are doing it for the right reasons, and take an approach that will pave the way for the kind of rekindling you want with no potential misunderstandings.